What creates motivation and what diminishes it?
What do you do when you feel unmotivated?
This is an opportunity for learning.
I either constantly berate myself to get going (which usually makes me feel worse) Or see this as an opportunity to acknowledge my needs and address them, so that I can feel cared for and then the motivation will come!
Today is a really hot day. I’m feeling tired and unmotivated. I don’t want to do anything. I keep trying to do things and feel so much resistance to it. And it is kind of frustrating, like there is a child inside of me that is acting out, and an adult who is on its back to get things done. And even though I have completed quite a lot of tasks today, it just seems like not enough. Is it because there are no set goals, and the unstructured nature of this means that there is no end point?
Maybe it is because what I really need is to rest. But how much rest is enough? And will resting just fester more resistance, more resting, more lack of motivation? Where is the point where you allow what feels right vs pushing through the resistance? When is it right to push for growth rather than go easy on yourself?
I have found in the past by having a compassionate attitude towards myself allows the resistance to be there, and therefore I am not resisting the resistance… and it passes.
Compassion & Self Care
Having compassion for myself, doing loving and self caring things for myself, which means not necessarily doing “nothing” but taking actions for things that are self caring.
What do you do for self care? A good way to explore this is through the five senses.
1. Sight – What are pleasant things to look at or see? A movie? A book? Nature? Art?
2. Smell – What are you favourite scents? Perfume? Nature? Incense? Food cooking?
3. Taste – Some yummy wholesome food or treats?
4. Touch – Getting a massage? Body lotion, having a shower, a comfy couch or cushion? washing your hair?
5. Sound- your favourite music, listening to an e-book? Being out in nature?
Writing yourself a compassion letter
1. I understand that… (describing the situation you are in)
2. I know that you feel… (acknowledging the feelings you are experiencing right now and that they are valid)
3. I just want you to know that… (offering your own inner guidance and wisdom)
Acknowledging actions and values
Listing the actions you have taken recently in your life, no matter how small.
With each action you have taken, what value is this representing or showing?
For example: I took a shower and washed my hair: I value myself, i value self care, and being fresh.
I made breakfast: I value feeding and fuelling my body to give it energy to be alive.
What now?
Do you feel any different? Are you still berating yourself and saying things like “this is not important, I should be doing all these other things etc. etc.” Maybe you are… and this is worth listening to as well. Write a compassion letter to this voice. See what comes of it. Maybe that part of you might have a few things to say back also! That’s okay, have a conversation with it and be curious to see what comes out of it.
If you do feel differently, what has changed?
The great things for me about lack of motivation is that often I get other things done that I didn’t plan to because I am procrastinating a task that is daunting or scary. That’s okay, everything is okay, you don’t always need to be productive, because everything has a natural flow and if there is no rest time, there is no pleasure in production time….