Five things I love about me.
Starting this image and thinking of five things I love about me can be challenging at times, and over the years it is something I have become better at. There was a time when I would not have been able to find 5 things.
I feel that sometimes the way I was brought up and the environment I live in has an unsaid rule that stops you from being able to truly love yourself. That by thinking and feeling that you are great, awesome and loveable makes you conceited and up yourself. Now I understand that one of the most important things about living a meaningful life is being able to develop a healthy self esteem.
Healthy, well what does that really mean? For me it means being able to see my value in the world, so that I can feel good about myself and who I am, regardless of what I do or achieve in the world. That me being worthy, is unconditional, no matter what circumstances I find myself in. I feel like this is necessary in a world that judges, and assesses your skills for employment, for relationships, for accomplishing things and being awarded certificates. These things assess your skills, but not who you really are. When you are able to separate this from who you are, and still have an unwavering knowing that you, at your essence are worthy of love, and hold qualities that surpass your circumstances, puts you in a position of being more resilient to what life throws at you.
So… how do you develop this? Because as a child, did we not all have this?
Before we were moulded into something else?
I don’t think there is an easy answer to this, and as much as we it can help to have your essence and being reflected back to you from those around you that love you, when it comes down to YOU on your own, where does this come from?
For me, I have developed this through others, through allowing myself to be seen, be vulnerable and be real with those around me. Not only the parts I deem “good” but all of it, the struggles, the judgements, the doubt, and the fear.
This allows me to be seen fully, and in my experience of this, I have become more connected, more loved, and more loving towards others. It has freed me up, I am not spending time and energy on hiding parts of me, which only develops more shame and disconnection.
When you continually show up, to those around you that you trust, you develop more self esteem, more trust in yourself and your own ability to be true to yourself. When you value yourself and your own experience, make yourself a priority in your life, and make your wellbeing a priority, you are telling yourself (through ACTION) that you are important, that you have your own back.
And then, over time, you can hear the question “what are five things that you love about yourself?” the struggle is not finding five things, but it choosing which five things to express…